Dagstukkie: Verwarring versus Genade

Die week het ek Galasiërs 1 bestudeer. Daar is soveel waarhede in die 24 verse saamgevat dat dit my ʼn tyd gaan vat om dit werklik deel van my gees te maak. Elke vers dra ʼn waarheid wat my as gelowige versterk om daadwerklik God te vat op sy woord.

Die een punt wat vir my die meeste uitgestaan het en wat ek onmiddellik gevat het, was vers ses en sewe. Spesifiek hoe dit in die Amplified Bible geskryf word:

“I am astonished and extremely irritated that you are so quickly shifting your allegiance and deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different [even contrary] gospel; 7which is really not another [gospel]; but there are [obviously] some [people masquerading as teachers] who are disturbing and confusing you [with a misleading, counterfeit teaching] and want to distort the gospel of Christ [twisting it into something which it absolutely is not].”

“EK verwonder my dat julle so gou afvallig word van hom wat julle deur die genade van Christus geroep het, na ʼn ander evangelie toe, 7terwyl daar geen ander is nie; behalwe dat daar sommige mense is wat julle in die war bring en die evangelie van Christus wil verdraai.” (Afr83)

Daar was ʼn tyd in my lewe dat verwarring en verdraaiing ʼn groot rol gespeel het. As gevolg daarvan het God se genade eenkant gestaan. Ek het aangeneem dat God my haat en in ruil het ek hom uit my lewe gesny. Ek was woedend vir die kerk, God en die mens.

Ons is lief om te noem dat God ʼn gentleman is wat ons ruimte gee om te verander – en in dié geval is dit ook waar. Waar ons toelaat dat ander gedagtes, woorde en leringe ons beïnvloed, sal genade ook opsy staan totdat ons weer tot die besef kom dat die probleem by ons is en nie by God nie. Die varkhok waar ons nie eers die peule sal ontvang om ons mae te vul nie. Ek weet, ek was daar.

Daarmee sê ek nie God se genade gaan weg nie. Selfs in daardie tye was God se hand oor my. Vandag kan ek dit sien.

Die gevaarsituasie waaruit ek sonder ʼn skrapie weggestap het. Mense wat Hy van my weggehou het. Ander, minder aangename situasies waar Hy my aandag gekry het.

God is ʼn waarmaker van sy woord, maar Hy gaan jou nie in die rede val en sy wonderbare genade aanhou gee as jy dit nie waardeer nie. Nee, Hy staan eenvoudig eenkant toe en doen sy werk in die stilligheid.

Vir Paulus het dit geïrriteer dat die Galasiërs hul lojaliteit verskuif het en hulle agter ander leringe aangeloop het i.p.v om by die waarheid te bly.

Het jy al opgemerk dat dit net in die boek van Galasiërs is waar hy die mense so direk aanspreek? Nie in een van die ander briewe doen hy dit nie: so, die saak is ernstig.

Bestudeer die Bybel en kyk hoe praat Paulus met die ander gemeentes.

 

• Wil jy weet hoekom voel dit of jy teen die plafon vasbid?
• Ondersoek jou lewe: waar bevraagteken jy God?
• Waar laat jy toe dat ander se opinies van God jou geloof beïnvloed?

Jy sien, die waarheid is: wanneer daar verwarring is, kan God se genade nie ten volle werk in ons lewens nie.

In vers drie tot vyf bid Paulus ʼn seën oor hulle uit:

“Grace to you and peace [inner calm and spiritual well-being] from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ, 4who gave Himself [as a sacrifice to atone] for our sins [to save and sanctify us] so that He might rescue us from this present evil age, in accordance with the will and purpose and plan of our God and Father— 5to Him be [ascribed all] the glory through the ages of the ages. Amen.”

• Wat leer ons hieruit?

God wil aan ons sy genade en vrede skenk. Hy wil hê dat dit met ons goed gaan, maar dan moet ons vashou aan sy woorde. Ons moet Christus se verlossingswerk aanvaar.

Ons moenie agter elke leerstelling aanhardloop nie. Al wat dit veroorsaak is verwarring. Waar verwarring is, kan God se genade nie tot vervulling kom nie. Daar kan vrede nie kom en jou hart en huis vul nie.

Aanvaar God se reddende genade. Aanvaar sy Woord as die enigste waarheid in jou lewe, en ervaar hoe goedheid en guns jou volg: al die dae van jou lewe.

Moenie wag totdat jy in die varkhok beland nie. Om dan ontslae te raak van die stank, kos baie trane en moeite. Trane wat ek jou wil spaar.

Neem ʼn daadwerklike besluit om nou om te draai en sien hoe God in jou lewe werk.

Jy is voorwaar ʼn geseënde van die Here.

Wandel daarin.

 

Lynelle Clark

Skakels van 'n Ketting 2

Clearance Sale of all paperbacks. Winter is coming... stock up.

 

Excerpts from Lynelle Clark’s books.

All paperbacks can be ordered by email: lynelleclark@gmail.com

 

WEBSITE  / TWITTER / FACEBOOK / GOODREADS AUTHOR PAGE

Title: A Pirate’s Wife. Free in Kindle on all platforms.

Genre: Historical Romance

Buy Links

Smashwords  / Amazon / Barnes and Noble / Kobo / Sony Book store 

Paperback is R100 excluding courier.

A Pirate's Wife (authorlynelleclark.blogspot.com) 

Blurb: 

Rosa Lee Almaida lived a sheltered and carefree life as a child. That changed when she and her mother experienced a horrific ordeal on the seas. Shipwrecked, survival in the heart of Africa became paramount. The only joy came after she met her adoptive father, a man honored by all sailors on sea and land for his bravery and unconditional love. He became her hero, the role model of her own husband to be. Now, twenty years later, forced to return to the seas that took the life of her birth father and so many others, she must learn to survive once more.

Abducted from her parent’s castle in Portugal, Rosa Lee Almaida becomes part of a ransom to The Falcon, a brutal Pirate King on the Island of Madagascar, in exchange for her younger brother Pedro’s life.

She comes face to face with The Falcon’s son, Roberto de Ville, a man as fierce as his illustrious father but who has his own hidden agenda. During the voyage, she learns to admire Roberto for his leadership and skill, but can she overlook his pirate exterior to see the man for who he is?

Through the inscriptions her parents left in their diaries, she learns about love and survival while trusting for a good outcome. In an unexpected turn of events, she learns she must trust Roberto unconditionally, hoping they will spare her life. She gives herself over to the love and intimacy of the man she now craves.

Taking Rosa Lee from Portugal, Roberto brings her to the Falcon on the Isle of St Mary. Enchanted by the stories told to him by her brother, he knows that Rosa Lee is destined to be his. Listening to her and seeing her bravery, he knows this is the woman he has waited for all his life. He will give up the dangerous life of a pirate, but first he must set an intricate plan into motion that will change his life forever. He, along with Pierre, his second in command, rush against time to bring the plan to fruition.

In the end, Rosa Lee discovers a valuable lesson that startles her: NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER.  

Excerpt:

Title: Bella’s Choice. 

Genre: Contemporary Romance

Buy Links

Amazon / I Like ebooks / The Writer’s room / Smashwords / Barnes and Noble  

Kobo / Webnovel  / Dreame / Ringdom 

Paperback R150 excluding courier

Bella's Choice (authorlynelleclark.blogspot.com)

To add to your TBR list on Goodreads. 

Blurb: 

Two roads. One choice. 

Anabella Anthony found she was alone in the world at eighteen. Early on, she made a choice; to live an ordinary life away from the lifestyle her parents preferred. However, they had plans for her; they wanted her to become a part of their choices. 

All she wanted was a regular household, with normal day to day issues like her peers, parents she could respect, and who above anything else would accept her for the person she is. Torn between dreams that filled her mind with alluring effects and uncomfortable events which tried to sway her, she had to come to a resolution: find peace and stay true to her convictions. 

Through it all, she excelled in her sport; a dedicated student who falls in love with a much older man. Will she give in to her body's desires, or will she remain steadfast in her own choices? Can she find the courage to stand amidst the turmoil wanting to drag her down? And most importantly, will she ever forgive those who meant to harm her? 

Aldrich Hagin, a lawyer, is ready to settle down. After a tragic loss he experienced right after university he is now, more than ever, ready to move on and start a family. And then he meets a young, energetic, lively woman who turns his life and heart around. Will he be willing to sacrifice his own desires and wait? Can he help her and be the anchor she so desperately needs? Confronted with his own decisions, the choice is his as to whether he’ll stay or leave. What will he decide? 

A love story filled with decisions both have to make; to stand against all odds and remain true to oneself. Will they make the right decisions?  

Excerpt

Titel: Juweel van die Oosgrens. 

Genre – Geskiedkundige roman  

Koop skakels

Sagteband R 130, koerierkostes uitgesluit. 

Smashwords / Amazon / Barnes & Noble / Kobo   

Voeg by jou leeslysie op Goodreads.  

Oorsig  

Die mengsel van tale het ʼn groot rol gespeel in die skepping van die taal wat ons vandag ken. Afrikaans is gevorm in die warm kombuise en wye vlaktes van ons mooi land en het vir vele interessante oomblikke gesorg.  

1815 is gekenmerk deur aanpassings, afstande en onluste. In die midde hiervan het Celeste Reyneke geleef. Op haar agtiende verjaarsdag verander haar lewe dramaties en eindig op in ‘n gerieflikheidshuwelik. Twee jaar later moet sy die wêreld weer alleen in die gesig staar en beland op die Oosgrens. Die tweejaar-lange huwelik was alles behalwe maanskyn en rose en eindig traumaties. Ontnugterd volg sy die pad die binneland in.  

Celeste het grootgeword in die Kaap van Storms met ʼn oop gemoed en lus vir die lewe. Sy kon lees en skryf en het ʼn ‘beroep’ gehad. Vir haar het dit natuurlik gekom om die tyd en reëls te verander soos wat die geleentheid hom voorgedoen het. Haar unieke talente kom dadelik op die voorgrond en gou besef mense sy is ʼn aanwins vir die gemeenskap. Maar sy het ook die koppe laat draai. Met die tekort aan vroue en haar natuurlike skoonheid trek sy die aandag.  

Barend Olivier, die toonbeeld van manlikheid en dapperheid, is op soek na ʼn vrou wat sal aanpas by sy lewe aan die Oosgrens. Tydens ʼn tweeweke-lange patrollie leer die twee mekaar ken. Maar die pad is lank, warm en rof en ʼn man kan net so lank van ʼn aantreklike vrou af wegbly voor die fisiese begeertes oorneem. Sal hulle betyds ʼn prediker kan vind?  

Die belangrikste vraag is: Sal Celeste hom toelaat om haar lief te hê?  

Ek nooi jou om saam met my op hierdie reis te gaan en nie net die spanning van hierdie tydperk te ervaar nie, maar ook die romanse te vind in die grasvlaktes van ons mooi land.  

Uittreksel

Title: Love at War. 

Buy Links

To add to your TBR list on Goodreads.

Paperback R280 excluding courier

Ns. Skrywershuis / Skrywersklets Clip / Smashwords / Amazon 

YouTube / Barnes & Noble / Webnovel / Ringdom / Dreame  

Blurb

Their enemies tried to outsmart them. Obedience their only defence.

Whisked to picturesque Valletta, a lonely nurse met her soul connection. It set the bar in a stirring plot of spiritual and physical survival as a determined warlord in Africa and a cunning wife in America trapped them. The healing sands of Iraq, their only hope.

Passionate about her work, war-torn South Sudan offered Sonia Main peace. When a man from her past confronted her, she had a choice to make. A choice that would influence her life.

Could Sonia let go of the past? Would her dreams continue to haunt her? Or would the warm sun of Africa burn away her fears?

Curt McGee was a man bound by honour and duty. It took him away from home for long periods of time.

Caught in infidelity, Curt's wife left him stunned. His children prey to an unthinkable enemy.

Would he get beyond his wife's betrayal?

Could he save his children?

Co-workers booked a flight for each to enjoy a weekend in Malta. It offered tranquillity and peace to weary souls.

Two worlds connect, and the result would change them both for eternity.

Love confronted them, not to be denied. But time played a trick and demanded a price. A price that would strip them of everything before they could experience the joy of a future.

Obedience was better than sacrifice, revealed the Holy Book. Would they yield or follow their own way?

They couldn’t run or hide from the onslaught. Their enemies' attacks growing in intensity. Crafty tricks added to the confusion, their fears real. It stripped them of their hopes and dreams. They could only go one way.

When Tau Gbadamosi met Sonia, he had a tough time understanding his feelings. War ravished his country. The enormous plight for help too great for one man or one fight. Faced with loyalty, he had to decide. Would he fail the test?

Africa's hopes and dreams burned brightly in the harsh sun. Poverty and lack the driving force for many ‘do-gooders’. But when a warlord sets his sight on the Red Cross nurse, all hell broke loose. No one could stand in his way.

Only God could stop him.

abduction, rape, abuse, military, adventure, love story, reproductive rights

Not for sensitive readers. Suggested age range 16+  

Writer's Journal for Beginners R150 excluding courier fee.

The hard copy is an A4 book, spiral binding and has 86 pages.

#creativewriting #WritersJournal #aspiringwriters #journalingcommunity

Dagstukkie: 'n Klein Klippie

 

“Koop ʼn sakkie sement, bou ʼn bruggie en kom daaroor.”

Het jy die stelling al gehoor of gebruik jy dit self?

Ek gebruik dit baie. Vernaamlik wanneer iemand sukkel om iets te verwerk: dit is gewoonlik in ligte luim bedoel en verwys na ʼn kleinigheid, in my oë. Soos ʼn bord wat breek en wanneer die persoon die hele dag daaroor kerm en kla. Of kla oor die kol op die mat … die lys kan nogal lank word.

Maar wat ek ook weet, wat vir my ʼn kleinigheid is, is vir ʼn ander ʼn groot probleem. Ons elkeen heg waarde aan verskillende dinge in ons lewens. Ons elkeen het ook die reg op ʼn opinie, maar wanneer dit ʼn probleem veroorsaak en gemoedere loop hoog, en dinge word gesê wat kon gebly het, raak dit ʼn probleem. Dit is hoe ons ‘n opinie lig wat gewoonlik die probleem vererger.

Hierdie tipe van situasie skuur enige verhouding tot teen die been.

Dit is soos ʼn klein klippie wat in jou skoen val en rondrol terwyl jy stap. Aanvanklik voel jy hom nie, maar dan besluit jy om ʼn lang ent te gaan stap sodat hy homself aan jou kan voorstel. Dit word naderhand onuithoudbaar ongemaklik. Jy kan dan stop en die klippie uitskud of jy kan dit ‘probeer’ ignoreer. Maar dit veroorsaak skaafplekke op jou hakke of tone wat oorsit in rousere. Dit word dan so seer dat jy later nie eers ʼn skoen kan aantrek nie.

Mense se vertroue word geskend net soos die vel wat oop gebreek word.

So is verhoudings.

Indien ons nie ruimte vir mekaar maak en help om daardie klippie te verwyder nie, dan verbreek dit vertroue en respek in ʼn groot mate. Dan word daardie klippie ʼn berg, so groot dat dit amper onmoontlik is om daaroor te kom. Dit kan mense selfs kniehalter in hul groei. Dit steel jou vreugde en vrede.

Hooglied praat van die jakkalsies wat die wingerd verwoes, of in hierdie geval ʼn verhouding verwoes.

Hooglied 2:15 “Vang julle vir ons die jakkalse, die klein jakkalse wat die wingerde verniel, want ons wingerde staan in die bloei.”

Wanneer hierdie klippie nie verwyder word nie, kan ʼn verhouding sleg seerkry. In sommige gevalle kan dit selfs generasies beïnvloed waar tweespalt aan die orde van die dag is – bloot net vir ʼn misverstand wat ontstaan het en waar twee mense te hardkoppig is om die saak uit te praat.

Hoe vinniger die klippie verwyder word, hoe vinniger kan vertroue herstel word.

Ons almal maak foute.

Goeie verhoudings verstaan die stelling en werk met mekaar om ʼn verhouding – waaraan hulle baie waarde heg, te laat werk. Hulle verwyder die jakkals en stap aan. Die verhouding is dan sterker as voorheen.

Die verhouding tussen ʼn ouer en kind, huweliksmaats, vriende, sosiale vriendskappe, werkers, die tuinman of bediende wat in jou huis werk – ons bou verhoudings met elkeen op ʼn ander manier. Elkeen se benadering is anders, juis omdat die dinamika verskil.

Verhoudings is gebaseer op intimiteit.

Wanneer jy ʼn huis bou, messel jy die sement tussen die stene in. Distansie word geminimaliseer deur die hoeveelheid sement wat gebruik word. Hoe meer sement – intimiteit: hoe nader aan mekaar, hoe beter die verhouding. Hierdie stene vorm dan ʼn unieke plek in die raamwerk van die huis. Indien dit swak gebou word, kan dit maklik kraak of selfs omwaai met die geringste wind.

Sement natuurlik, bestaan uit ʼn mengsel van sand, water en sementpoeier. Indien die verhouding nie reg is nie, kan dit nie sy werk doen nie. Net so is dit in enige verhouding. Indien die verhouding nie reg is nie, is daar geen werkbare produk om die muur te bou nie.

Daar moet eweveel vertroue, samehorigheid, liefde, geduld en respek wees van albei kante af. Indien nie, sal die sement afval.

Dink hieroor:

·         Wanneer laas het jy na jou verhoudings gekyk?

·         Is hulle gebou op goeie grond?

·         Wanneer laas het jy daaraan gewerk sodat die huis stewig kan wees?

·         Kan jy enige krake identifiseer?

 

Enige verhouding word gebou van twee kante af. Indien nie, sal die krake begin wys. Krake soos: geen kommunikasie, tyd, ongeduld, en onvergewensgesingheid.

Daarom is dit belangrik om dit voor die Vader te lê.

 

Gebed: Liewe Heer, help my vandag om die blinders af te haal van my eie lewe. Help my om --------------- (noem die probleem by naam) op te los. Ek bely my fout hierin. Help my om geduldig te wees met -------------- (noem die persoon se naam) en dat ons hierdie verhouding kan red. Help my om ʼn goeie bouer te wees waarvan die sement reg is.

In Jesus Naam, Amen.

 

Lynelle Clark

Skakels van 'n Ketting 2

Introducing a new book: A Path to Live by Elma van der Merwe.

WHAT DO I WANT TO ACHIEVE WITH THE BOOK?

I want to share out of my journal my story from the beginning of how God started to draw me to Him, then prepare me for a time such as this. Our Beloved is as close as our breath. The Spirit of the Living God lives inside every true, blood-bought believer and is involved in the smallest detail of our lives.  

God is El Roi, the God who sees. God communicates with us in different ways. I want to share with you such different ways I have experienced. God works in strange ways. We cannot try to reason God out with our little brains. When God gives you a dream or a vision, I believe it will happen and I am going to show you why I can make such a statement.

 

A LETTER TO MY MOTHER 

Dear Mother, Tokkie, I long for you. After you passed away, Mom, it was like I went looking for you everywhere. When I could not find you, I decided to forget about you. I thought Rosie will help me. My longing for you was too much. I wanted to forget just for a moment and wanted to stop the longing. Rosie and I spend a lot of time together. 

How many times have we laughed together and enjoyed a bottle of “Rosie”? Do you remember all our laughs, silly jokes, and pranks? I still remember your words, "Are we going to take Rosie with us today?" Then I say, "It is her last chance today. She better behave." Rosie made us dance. We danced like in the sixties. You taught me long arm dance. When we danced and I looked into your eyes, I could never have imagined that a day would come when I would no longer smell you; your musk oil. I would no longer be able to feel your body against my body. No more would I see your smile. 

You loved David so much and always took his side when I complained. When he danced with you, you rested your head against his chest. 

After you passed away, Mom, I find myself looking for you everywhere, even between the shelves in the Pick & Pay. I was so hoping I would run into you; I have missed you so much. Everything was falling apart, and I need a mother. I went looking for a mother at the Old Age Home.  

There at the Old Age Home, I laughed and cried with other children’s mothers; they cried for a lost child, and I cried for a lost mom. I pressed their bodies to my chest, hoping to smell the musk oil. Mom, their bodies smelled like powder. Aunt Dina recited and sang to me. That was the closest I got to you. No one danced with me.  

Mom, I am sorry I had burned all of your expensive church books. I made the decision when I read your letter. In the letter, you wrote about your dream. You had a dream of God saying that you should stop putting a jacket on the lie. I knew when I read it that you knew that God does not distinguish between races and that, let's call it "Dream for separation of nations" turned into a nightmare. It’s all lies, mom. The day the Lord sent me to the "Rock of Hope" He told me that He was going to teach me something when I looked into the eyes of a baby of another race for the first time, that day the lie was broken and I knew that God is not unjust God loves all people, mom!  

Now 16 years later. Rosie is no longer part of our lives. She could not stop the longing; she could not stop the pain.  

I am drinking from the True Vine now. It is new wine, dear Mom. This wine comes with bread. I smell Jesus and I dance on Abba's feet. I am drunk with LOVE.  

The Lord sent us to the Western Cape, mom. Thank you for the Bible that you gave to Jan-Hendrik. I still remember the days when you were friends with his mother and would just walk across the street to visit. Now you both walk on the same golden streets in heaven. He then is still a young man at university came to visit, and you showed him things from the Bible. David and I were already married and Dawie was already in primary school.  

How wonderful the Lord is. We were both in Pretoria and here we ran into each other again in Strandfontein. It was twelve years after you passed away. We are both pastors now. Mom, would you ever think that I would become a pastor, or even Jan-Hendrik? The day he gave me your Bible, he told me that you, mom, gave him a love for the Word of God. It made my heart felt so warm.  

Mother, our feet are hanging in the air and we are waiting for the Lord to establish us. We are up and down the coast and now we are a bit tired from all the traveling. Sometimes I wish I can call you mom. I have so many things to tell, to ask for your advice.  

Thank you for all the Scriptures that you have marked in the Bible. I saw that you marked the day; I fear. I must trust in the Lord. I trust the Lord, mom I will not fear.  

It is just a temporary goodbye until we meet again…

Your daughter Ellie  

To buy: 

Ebook R100, excluding courier fee.

Paperback R210, excluding courier fee. 

Contact Elma: 082 4684511 (WhatsApp) and email: elma@globalpcs.co.za

 

Dagstukkie: ‘n Invloedryke vriendekring

Dit is altyd lekker om met mense te gesels waar jy veilig voel. ʼn Plek waar jy jou opinie kan gee, raad kan vra, bystand kan ontvang ten tye van nood, en sommer net laf kan wees by tye.

Ek beny mense met sulke vriendekringe. ʼn Plek waar jy kan ontspan en die masker kan afhaal. Plekke van invloed en saamstaan deur dik en dun.

Vriende beïnvloed mekaar deur wat hulle doen, deur gemene faktore wat hul saambind. Amper soos in Mafia-rolprente.

“You killed his son, I kill yours …” kan jy daardie diep Italiaanse aksent hoor?

Maar wanneer jy dieper kyk, verby al die pretensie en skitterblink skerms, besef jy dit is alles net oëverblindery. Maskers en handskoene kom af en jy moet keer vir jou “wickets”. Dit is die soort venyn wat mense breek en gesinne opbreek. Dan weet ek, ek is tevrede om op my eie te wees.

Daar was ʼn tyd in my lewe wat ek werklik gesmag het daarna om deel van so ʼn groep te wees, net om ru wakker geskud te word en te besef dit is net op die groot doek moontlik.

Jaloesie en venyn is aan die orde van die dag, en in plaas van saam staan, is daar ʼn dwarsboming van vriendskappe, en word tonge messe wat fyn kerf en verniel, sonder om twee maal te dink aan die nagevolge daarvan. Dit is erger as ʼn “soapie”.

Toe ek in 1992 tot bekering gekom het, het ek ʼn hoop in my gehad vir iets soortgelyks, net met ʼn geestelike geur daarby. Op daardie stadium was my kinders alreeds in die kleuter- en laerskool. My dae het bleek gelyk en ek het gedink ʼn vriendskapskring sal die gaping vul.

Maar helaas, dit wat ek in die wêreld ervaar het, was amper erger in die geestelik ekwivalent daarvan. Skielik is ons gawes beter as die volgende ou s’n. Of afguns veroorsaak dat mense onder mekaar baklei vir beter gawes. Jy bid beter as sy. God beantwoord my gebed maar nie joune nie, want ek doen iets reg.

Jaloesie is die grootste sonde wat vriendskappe vernietig en kerke opbreek.

My wêreld was aan flarde na so ʼn skermutseling, en van toe af stap ek baie fyn om vriendskappe en laat net spesifieke mense toe in my binnekring.

Jesus self het dissipels gehad wat vir drie jaar saam met hom gewandel het. Drie van die dissipels was nader aan hom; sy binnekring: Johannes, Petrus en Jakobus. Johannes, weet ons, was die enigste een wat nader aan Jesus was as ʼn broer.

Vanuit hierdie voorbeeld leer ons dat dit wys is om binnekring vriende te hê. Mense wat jy kan vertrou met alles in jou lewe. Om ʼn Judas byvoorbeeld in jou lewe te hê, sal pyn veroorsaak. Vroeër of later gaan hy/sy jou verraai. Daarom is dit nodig dat jy versigtig moet wees. Ek wil amper sê; wees kieskierig oor wie sy kop figuurlik op jou bors sal sit.

Miskien is jy een van die gelukkiges wat wel so ʼn vriend of vriendin het. Een wat jou hart hoor. Wat jou raaksien vir wie jy is en wat jou rug toemaak. ʼn Persoon wat jy vertrou, maar wat jou ook uitdaag om verder te gaan. Wat bereid is om terug te staan, sodat jy kan floreer en andersom.

Vriendskap is waar jy minder word en die ander meer. Dit is die plek waar jy gemaklik is om jou opinie te lig, sonder dat dit op Facebook uitgeblaker word of jou woorde verdraai word om hom/haar goed te laat lyk. ʼn Invoedryke vriendskap, waarby albei partye baat vind.

Dink aan die TV-reeks “Suits” of die gewilde rolprente van “Fast en Furious”. Die rede hoekom dit so gewild is, is juis oor die Dawid/Jonatan vriendskappe. In “Suits” is Harvey Specter die bekende prokureur wie se paaie kruis met ʼn bedrieër, Mike Ross. Maar Harvey kyk verby al die lae vernis en sien ʼn persoon raak op wie hy ʼn kans kan waag. ʼn Persoon wat hy kan help op die leer na sukses.

In “Fast en Furious” het ons vir Brian O’Connor as polisieman wat Dominic Toretto se bende moet infiltreer, en die reeks skop af met die twee wat ʼn band het wat ons meesleur om rolprent na rolprent te gaan kyk. In elke rolprent word hierdie verhouding getoets en geskaaf tot die uiterste toe.

Dit is wat vriendskap is – ons kyk verby die vernis, die kwalifikasies, die prestige en ons sien mekaar raak. Vriendskap gaan oor omgee. Dit gaan oor verstaan.

Dit is ʼn vriendskap wat ons almal begeer. Die week maak jy dit ʼn gebedsaak. Nommer een om so ʼn vriend te kan wees, en nommer twee om so ʼn vriend te kry.

Indien jy wel so ʼn vriendskap het, koester dit. Jy is enig en uniek daarin.

Lees gerus Romeine 8 en vind so jou vriend wat nader is as ’n broer. Vra die Here om jou te wys hoe jy kan verander om self ook so ’n vriend te wees en wees dit.

 

Lynelle Clark

Skakels van 'n Ketting 2

Repost: Be true to yourself

Repost:

The last couple of months were the most exciting but also hurtful time I had in a very long time. Although silent in the sense that I wrote nothing, my life had undergone twists and turns; each opportunity a learning curve where I discovered so much of myself as a person.

Walking this path alone, I realized my vulnerability and how people could use me, sometimes even with my permission. For a long time I lived in a very safe cocoon allowing others to think for me but since I made the bold step to stand on my own, taking responsibility for myself, I realized that my understanding of life was very much shaped by my circumstances, and the people or culture I lived in. In short, I wasn’t street smart, and I had to learn how to fit in or be devoured.

Because of the safe haven, I perceived people in black and white with little or no grace towards them. Now those unyielding glasses had been removed and my awareness of life became more colourful; making room not only for my own mistakes but for those for those I’ve met. Life isn’t rigid or set in stone but a kaleidoscope of laughter and passion, where I discover new opportunities at every corner—venturing out in the unknown to find incredible prospects and beautiful things along the way. I’m amazed at my boldness walking into places I would not have dreamed to do previously and in the process made friends: my pioneer spirit reveling in the new person emerging from the cocoon.

In my vulnerability, I learned to trust my gut; I made mistakes when I disobeyed that little voice, who diligently watch over me. While doing this, I learned to have fun laughing more than I did in a long time. I learned that it’s okay to mess up—no longer do I chastise myself in doing so—and ate some humble pie, but it taught me valuable skills that served me in my daily life and work environment. I work with people every day and I experience the good, the bad and the ugly all in one week. As human beings, we have different perceptions, but when finely tuned in—making the effort—the ugly turns out beautiful, the bad good and the good sometimes bad. Life is a fine balance between them all.

My love life has its own challenges. When two people meet, two worlds have to come together effortlessly (in my mind). To adjust myself and find meaning and what I really want from life, incorporating another human being into it without forgetting who I am, is a mission. For now, being part of someone’s life has taken a back seat.

In a second chance relationship, more work goes into it but it took a broken relationship to grasp the full extend of it. When we met, I thought this is it, the man I will spend my old age with and I prepared myself to fit in his life but after a while I realized it would take time, effort and if both parties doesn’t work at it every attempt would be fruitless. When it ended, it left me purposeless and empty and I knew I would obliterate myself. I feel the emptiness settling in me, wondering if I would ever allow myself to love again. Although saddened, I realize I need this time to get to terms with it all and discover my purpose.

I never appreciated my passionate side, hiding it from everyone including myself, but on this new journey I got to discern the intensity which I feel with and know not everyone would appreciate it. Although I embrace my passionate side, it makes me vulnerable to life and relationships. Creating its own challenges. I’ve learned more about myself letting go of old or even wrong thought patterns, finding the balance and adapt in a way so that I won’t get lost again.

Another learning curve.

With all this said, I simply want to leave you with the thought: Don’t be afraid to live, to dream, to love and yes, even to make mistakes.

To be true to ourselves takes determination and courage and sometimes you would be lonely. Not sure about the choices or even the next step, but looking at the bigger picture, we learn to know our own strengths by discovering a world that would accept us for who we are.

But mostly to accept ourselves.

Be true to you. 

Dagstukkie: Hoe hanteer jy konflik?

Jy kners op jou tande … sien rooi. Jy skud jou kop en wonder of jy reg gehoor het.

Die persoon voor jou skel jou uit vir als wat sleg is en jy wonder wie is die persoon is na wie hy verwys? Dit kan onmoontlik nie jy wees nie.

Beleef jy dit ook so tydens konflik?

Ek weet ek doen. Aanvanklik is ek so geskok oor die aanval, en die absolute gif waarmee dit uitgespoeg word. Dan slaan dit my tussen die oë en die woorde spoel oor my soos ’n gebreekte tape wat aanhou en aanhou en ek weet nie hoe om dit af te sit nie. Dan, wanneer dit verby is, raak ek kwaad … smoorkwaad. Ek sien letterlik rooi. Soms wil ek terug skree en ander tye bly ek net eenvoudig stil.

Ek is nie perfek nie. Ek het dit nog nooit gesê of geïmpliseer nie. Tog lees mense dit in my optredes, of ek dit nou wil erken of nie.

Na ʼn onlangse bakleiery met my broer, het ek dit weereens besef.

Die manier hoe ons oorkom, word deur ander gesien as baasspelerig en beterweterig. As ma van drie groot kinders, is ek gewoond om op ʼn sekere manier te praat. My kinders en kleinkinders aanvaar my so – want ek is hul ma en ouma. Maar, sonder dat ek dit besef, behandel ek ander mense – wat veel jonger as ek is – ook so. Dan waai die hare, spat die spoeg en loop die gemoedere oor.

Dit was nie maklik om dit te erken nie.

Ek moes werk aan my manier van praat met ander. Halsstarrig het ek geredeneer dat ek nie verkeerd is nie. My punt is geldig en ek weier om my siening te verander. Maar dit gaan nie oor my siening of punt in hierdie verband nie. Dit gaan oor my optrede. Die manier wat ek oorkom en kommunikeer.

Ek moes ʼn daadwerklike poging aanwend om my manier van praat te verander om sodoende konflik te vermy. Vader moes ʼn paar maal my herinner dat ek hom in die eerste plek moes vergewe. Ja, sy optrede was verkeerd. Vloek en skel het nog nooit gehelp nie. Maar my optrede was ook.

Dit het my ʼn tydjie gevat om hom te vergewe vir dit wat hy gesê het. Ek het gebelgd en vernederd gevoel. Maar op die ou einde moes ek erken dat ek verkeerd was en dat ek die situasie op ʼn ander manier kon hanteer het. 

Ons manier van praat en ons keuse van woorde, bepaal hoe mense ons sien en hoor. Dit mag nie my bedoeling gewees het om so op te tree nie, maar vanuit sy oogpunt was ek aanmatigend. Ek moes hom vryspreek.

Matteus 18:22 (AFR83): “Ek sê vir jou, nie sewe keer nie maar selfs sewentig maal sewe keer.”

Ons manier van konflikhantering moet gebaseer wees op die Woord. Die Woord van God is ons handleiding tot ons alledaagse lewe. Daarsonder sal ons nie weet hoe om op te tree in sekere situasies nie.

Is dit my plig om iemand te vergewe? Ja.

Kan ek iemand anders se gedagtes verander oor ʼn saak? Nee. Net God kan. Solank as wat ek nie vergewe nie, kan God nie werk met daardie persoon nie. Dit is nie my taak om aan hom uit te wys dat hy verkeerd opgetree het nie. Dit is my taak om hom vry te spreek en liefde te betoon. Sewentig maal sewe keer.

Die Heilige Gees sal hom oortuig. Ek is nie verantwoordelik vir sy optrede nie. God is. Maar solank as wat ek vashou, is ek soos ʼn hond aan ʼn ketting. Ek gaan aanhou hap en byt. Wanneer ek vergewe, is die drang om te hap en byt uit die weg geneem en kan ʼn oplossing bereik word. Solank as wat ek kwaad is, sal daar ʼn skeiding wees.

Ek los julle met hierdie skrif in 1 Petrus 3:8-10: “Ten slotte: Wees almal eensgesind, medelydend, liefdevol, goedhartig, nederig. 9Moenie kwaad met kwaad vergeld of belediging met belediging nie. Inteendeel, antwoord met ʼn seënwens, want daartoe is julle geroep, sodat julle die seën van God kan verkry. 10Daar staan geskrywe: “As iemand die lewe liefhet en ʼn lang lewe begeer om die goeie te geniet, moet hy sy tong weerhou van kwaadpraat en sy lippe van leuens.”

Vergifnis is nie maklik nie, maar nodig. Indien jy wil leer hoe om konflik te hanteer of te vermy, vra die Heilige Gees waar jy moet verander. Wanneer jy luister, sal jy die vrug pluk van jou besluit. Dit is beter om in vrede te leef met God se guns, as in onmin en uit God se wil.

Geniet ʼn mooi dag.

 

Lynelle Clark

Skalels van 'n Ketting 2

Kopiereg voorbehou